I actually dont know what to write, or how to say these feelings inside of me. 3 people have died. and that just hits me – how fragile this life can be. and they are still around 17 years of age.
Still 17 years of age! It’s the age where we start spreading our wings and learn how to fly, to live up our dreams… these people will never know what it feels like to go to university, to work, to buy their first car, to get married… to do many other things in the world and they will never know how to live up their dreams. They have so many talents within them but they are unable to reach for their stars…
In memoriam of Nikita Putri, Rio Hartanto, and Erfin Januar (26-27/02/2010):
I cant imagine ‘dying’. As teenagers we have the vocabulary that death = old, sick people. Yes, we have heard news everywhere that many people are dead etc etc etc. But not like this. Not this close. Not in your ring of friendship.
I may not know the three of you, but as your friends’ friend, somehow there lies a connection. I can’t even imagine dying 2 weeks before my sweet seventeenth birthday. I’m a girl, and I have lived passed by 17th birthday, with all the party, gifts, and one-day-princess like,, I cant even imagine… it’s the day that every girl longs for and wishes for… the big day, to be remembered. to shine your beauty…
I can’t imagine loosing my boyfriend. maybe a few minutes before he goes im texting msgs to him. Will my last message to him be “i love you”? or that “Im proud of you”? does he know that i love him damn much, that i’m so grateful for having him in my life? or are we spending the last moments we have by quarreling about something unimportant? fighting about little stuffs that r going to haunt me forever? I may not have a bf right now but what if when I do have, he is taken from me?
I can’t imagine loosing my best friend. The usual friend who is always there for you, the one who sits next to you in class and tell lousy jokes every day. Well, she/he is just not there anymore. GONE.
I can’t imagine loosing my family. If it is my sister who sits in that car, will she know that i love her so much and that she is the best sister that i can have in the whole world? and to whom I can go when i want to cry? when i want to tell my feelings and tell my problems to? I cant imagine…
Everything that happens, happens for a reason. and i guess, through this, I’m aware of the fact that life is fragile. life is temporary. we all will loose our lives someday soon. life is to precious to be wasted. life is too damn beautiful to be filled with unimportant stuffs. life is a gift. and we must live our lives…
another thing that I can’t get out of my mind is: what if I’m the one who is in that car? will people feel sad because I’m gone? or will they cheer cause I’ve caused troubles to them? there’s a cliche that says: when you are born, everybody around you smiles while you cry. live your life so that when you die, you’ll smile and everybody around you cry. the point is, am i a good person? Those three people, by reading their wall posts, it seems like they are very good people. People from everywhere saying their condolences and their griefs. If I’m the one who is in that car, will they do the same for me as well? will I be known as a good person, who cares for others etc etc; or will i be known as a bad person that doesn’t care for others and causes much troubles for them..? I want people to remember my name… but am I living the very life that I’m supposed to live? I dont think so…
Now when I’m aware of the fact, I’m also aware that we must live each day as if it is our last day. tell your family that u love them. tell your love ones that u love them. that you’re proud of them.
…and get straight. Last Sunday when I went to Bethany church in Singapore, the preacher says that “It’s time to get serious. Which God r u going to serve?”
and if I was the one in that car, and I will face God right now, I know He won’t be able to tell me that, “Well done, my daughter.” I don’t even know that He’ll accept me in heaven. I’m a sinner. and I’m feeling sorry for myself for not getting serious for too many times. too many chances passed me by, too many of His callings that I’ve ignored. too many time I’ve wasted.
I haven’t done anything for the Lord.
I hope that God will give strength for those who have been left behind, for He has His own purposes why this has happened. I hope that their families can let them go, and move on. I don’t know how hard it is; loosing your daughter or son, loosing your girlfriend, your best friend… and then there are just people who distort the facts, gossip, or maybe blame one another. and when there are people dying, the others are just ‘busy’, trying to figure the facts of this and that… but as time goes by, everything will be just fine. lean on God, and He promises to be with us through every sadness we have.
and for us, let’s live our lives to the fullest. If you want to make some changes, do it today. If you want to ask for forgiveness, or telling someone “i love you”, tell them now. If you have quarrels with your father and mother, go meet them today. who knows, tomorrow may be too late.
“If you’re mad with someone and nobody’s there to fix the situation… You fix it. Maybe today, that person still wants to be your friend. And if u doesn’t, tomorrow can be too late.
If you’re in love with somebody, but that person doesn’t know…tell her/him. Maybe today, that person is also in love with you. And if you don’t say it, tomorrow can be too late.
If you still love a person that you think has forgotten you…tell her/him. Maybe that person has always loved you. And if you don’t tell her/him today, tomorrow can be too late.
If you need a hug of a friend… ask her/him for it..Maybe they need it more than you do. And if you don’t ask for it today, tomorrow can be too late.
If you really have friends who you appreciate… tell them. Maybe they appreciate you as well. That if you don’t and they leave or go far away today, tomorrow can be too late.
If you love your parents, and never had the chance to show them… do it. Maybe you have them there to show them how you feel. That if you don’t and they leave today, and then tomorrow can be too late.”
for more info: http://starah0lic.blogspot.com/2010/03/httpjovanzkadevina.html,